Joy to the world I got in my car
And almost killed everyone
I almost killed everyone

I almost killed a kid for Chirstmas
He almost had to fucking flee
And if I didn't stop for him
His guts would be all over the street

All of the other drivers
Used to laugh and call me names (Used to?)
Cause they said my driving
Was really fucking lame (Cause it is!)

Then one foggy Christmas eve
I got real fucking drunk
I got into my shitty car
And almost killed them all

Then all the other drivers
As they shouted out with hate (Fuck you!)
We'll fucking kill you next year
Just you fucking wait