Ivor Biggun
Ivor Biggun - The Yodelling Winker (misprint) lyrics
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In far Switzerland Lives a goatherd who's hand Has a palm that is calloused and worn From his idle vice Despite mum's advice Not to play with his old alpine horn When he stuck his c*ck In a large cuckoo clock His helmet went right through the cranker He went "Yodel-o yodel-o yodel-o arghh!" And they call him the yodelling w*nker In the mountains up there Young women are rare And that's why the goatsherd depends On holes found in trees And emmental cheese And the a*ses of four-legged friends But one nanny goat Aimed a kick at his scrote And caught him one heck of a flanker He went "Yodel-o yodel-o yodel-o arghh!" And they call him the yodelling w*nker Oh Yodel-o-yodel-o-yodel-o-do He's singing so melodious His voice seems to go to a yodel-o-do Whenever he tightens his truss * While digging for sheep In a snowdrift so deep The corpse of a tourist he found She was stiff as a board But when she was thawed He 'ad 'er from all sides around At the thirty-third stroke The maiden awoke And bit off his old hanky-panker He went "Yodel-o yodel-o yodel-o arghh!" And they call him the yodelling w*nker (Adieu) The valleys all echo His yodel falsetto "My darling please say where you are!" From the mountaintop high He hears this reply "Baa... Baa... Baa... And your old lady too!" *Ivor's alternative couplet... While having a sh*te In a snowdrift so white