Ya see  I'm Irish  but I'm not a leprechaun
 You wanna fight  then step up and we'll get it on
 You gotta right to the grill  I'm white and I ill
 A decendant of Dublin with titanic skill
 I ducked and I swing  next thing your jaw's broken
 Punk I ain't jokin'  you can bet you'll be chokin'
 On a fist full a nothin'  meanwhile I'll be puffin'
 On a fat blunt  run punk, you don't know the half
 Tryin' to talk shit, man, please don't make me laugh
 These Irish eyes are smilin', I'm buckwildin'
 The House Of Pain is pumpin', start jumpin'
 Freak it, funk it, back seat junk it
 If you can't get with it, you'll wind up sweatin' it
 Then you'll get a beatin' just like an egg
 It's so hard to run when you've got a broken leg
 But we can have a run off, the House Of Pain'll come off
 We got the cake that you're tryin' to get a crumb off
 The Irish stylee, the Celtic jazz
 No one has it, just us that's it
 If you try to take it, I got a big shileighly
 I don't have dreads cause I shave my head daily
 You call me a skin head, I call you a pin head
 Yo, where you been man, just like the tin man
 You got no heart, here comes the good part
 I pick 'em, buck 'em, cut 'em up, and buck them down
 No fuckin' around
 Home boy ya get clown like Krusty, trust me
 You shouldn't play, and by the way
 Top o' the mornin' to ya

 Chorus
 (What's the hassle man?) Top o' the mornin' to ya (2x)
 (Hey, are you givin' us a hassle man?)

 Greetins, salutaions
 Peace to the nations of Zulu and Islam
 Crack the bottle, rev the throttle
 Put the gear in, now you're stearin'
 Like Mario Andretti
 So let me kick it, cause I can make a wicked
 Noise like a cricket
 Rubbin' his legs, my rhymes are like eggs
 I'll keep layin' 'em, I'll keep sayin' 'em
 This is the House Of Pain, we're far from plain
 But we're not fancy, Ron and Nancy
 So just say no, but I say go
 Straight to hell, I kiss and tell
 So if you're a ho, all my friends know
 What you gotta say, let's hit the hay
 And have no delay, and yo, by the way
 Top o' the mornin' to ya

 Chorus

 Extra extra, read all about it
 How could ya doubt it?
 Now scream and shout it!
 The House Of Pain soon will reign
 Over the hip hop scene and like golden green
 I rip shit and back flip like a Jedi
 I roll with the groove and I'm smooth and you can bet I
 Come correct and get respect when I'm flowin'
 Collectin my dough, I got you're girlfriend ho-in'
 And how do I know that she's funk?
 I know she's broke cause yo, the T's hung like a
 Shetland pony, gettin' paid like Sony
 So never ever try to play me out like a phony
 Cause I can get real thick like a bull with Mark Toneil
 And by the way, top o' the mornin' to ya

 Chorus