[Verse 1:]
My maid is cleaning my bathroom, so I can't take a shower
When I do, the water starts getting cold after an hour
I couldn't order off the breakfast menu, cause I slept in till two
Then I filled up on bread, didn't leave any room for tiramisu
Oh no, there's a pixel out in the corner of my laptop screen
I don't have any bills in my wallet small enough for the vending machine
Some idiot just called me up on the phone, what!? Don't they know how to text? OMG!
I got
[Chorus:]
First world, first world problems
(First world problems)
First world, first world problems
(First world problems)
First world, first world problems
[Verse 2:]
I bought too many groceries for my refrigerator
Forgot my gardener's name, I'll have to ask him later
Tried to fast forward commercials, can't - I'm watching live T.V
I'm pretty sure the cookies in this airport lounge ain't gluten free
My barista didn't even bother to make a design in the foam on the top of my vanilla latte
[Chorus]
[Verse 3:]
Can't remember which car I drove to the mall
My Sonicare won't recharge, now I gotta brush my teeth like a neanderathal
The thread count on these cotton sheets has got me itching
My house is so big, I can't get WiFi in the kitchen
Uh, I had to buy something I didn't even need just 
so I could qualify for free shipping on Amazon
[Chorus x2]
[Outro]
(Laughing)