Christmas celebration 
And all around the nation 
Won`t you stay with me tonight cause 
I`m running out of fight 
and the pagentry is such a bore 
Carolers are singing 
registers Ka-chinging 
And the presents are in place 
but I`d rather eat some mace 
`cause the eggnog always makes me sick 
You know how the story goes 
you`ve seen it all before 
That man is so obese that he can`t get out the door 
Christmas to perfection 
I`m begging for some action 
and the ringing in my ears 
is the sound of Christmas cheer 
and they`ve knocked me screaming overboard