with my nigga Coolio, got me to' the fuck back
 High as a UFO, standin in my drawers
 in the hall, talkin to the walls
 Now a nigga's spooked, umm
 *Snagglepuss voice* Heavens to merkatroids, I'm looped!
 I'm tripping! *normal voice* Nigga what do I see?
 It's me, that nigga Dub C on the TV
 Now I know I'm buzzed
 cause I'm on the TV but the TV's unplugged
 Damn, this shit is like the Twilight Zone
 *sings theme* Na-na-na-na, na-na-na-na; I'm blowed!
 Cause now I'm havin illusions, illusions
 of me on channel eleven on a black and white tube and
 Mack and the Gene are one of mine show
 Hangin with Sinead and they sippin on the four-oh
 Now I know I'm trippin *Martin Lawrence voice* Oh my goodness!
 Let me change the TV and
 Dizamn! Once again there I go
 But this time it's channel thirteen on Arsenio
 I'm smokin a wet one on the couch
 Givin up a fat middle finger to the crowd
 I'm faded, but not in a way in which you ever seen
 peep the side effects, yeah, I'm on the set

 Chorus: *singers*

 Asshole naked standin in front of the set; I'm wet
 Ain't no escapin when yo' ass is wet; I'm wet

 Look, look, way up in the sky everybody just
 look, look, and you'll find me flyin high
 So there I was, standin in front of the set mesmerized
 Kickin off the scenery right before me eyes
 High as a motherfucker what was I to do?
 Cause now the yerm has got me thinkin I'm on channel two
 Peep it -- bip-bip-bip like the bi-on-ic man I'm out of control
 and now I see myself on Highway Patrol
 Runnin from the Feds tryin to make my get away
 but there's *singin* nowhere to run, ba-bay
 And now exhausted from this drama I needed a rest
 So I went on channel four so I can catch my breath
 Now who's this after five minutes of bein there
 I met this motherfucker named the Fresh Prince of Bel Air
 Yeah this nigga was funny I must admit it
 but his Uncle and his cousin Carlton was straight bitches
 Them niggaz was cock blockin, talkin bout killin me
 cause I told em I wanted to fuck the shit out of Hillary, ooh
 Now what's a realer trip to fantasy, all I know
 is she was lookin good sportin them t-shirt and panties, huh
 I can't believe this shit, nigga I'm wet
 Fuck tricks, my mind is playin with dipsticks, I'm on the set

 Chorus

 Still blowed from the chemicals I'm askin was it worth it
 Cause like Slick Rick now Dub C is scared and I'm nervous
 Cause now the TV's changin by itself, uh-oh danger
 Cause now I see myself on channel nine on the Gladiators
 I'm swingin on a rope with a gauge
 Boom, bang bang, you niggaz can't hang
 Fuck a obstacle fool, I had them buff bitches runnin
 Mass confusion now I hear one-time comin
 So I swing to the exit, jumped off and jetted
 Thank God mama kept the baby gat ready
 I left all them bitches behind, til I got to channel fifty-two
 and there I found myself on Good Times
 Here was me and this nigga named J.J.
 Out on a double date, just sippin on Kool-Aid
 Now umm, ain't no need for me to pretenda
 like my date was all that like J.J.'s boo-boo Belinda
 yo, but she had a ass like Thelma, titties like Walona
 Drunk off the Mad Dog I fucked around and boned her
 Like J.J. the pussy was dy-no-mite though
 I must admit the hoe had a mug as ugly as Flo'
 I'm on tha set