[Kool Moe Dee:] 

Ho Ho Ho 

Open up ya do 

I'm Santa Claus and guess what y'all 

I got something to show 

I came to bring some Christmas Spirit 

I got a big bag now guess what's in it 

Something for the rich and something for the po 

So Merry Christmas and ho ho ho 



[L.A. Sunshine:] 

Ho Ho Ho Merry Christmas my foot 

I'ma tell you what Santa really put 

under my so-called tree but in reality 

looked like nothin but a decorated pole to me 



[Special K:] 

Man, you talk about a tree it makes wonder 

cause I never had a tree to put anything under 

if I ever did luck up and get a tree 

there was never anything under it for me 



[Kool Moe Dee:] 

Man I don't what y'all talking about 

cause when I come to your town I just get kicked out 

You think I'm getting presents made for free 

I gotta pay them elves and ain't nobody paying me 



[L.A. Sunshine:] 

You big fat whale you might as well quit 

cause I can name a hundred presents that I didn't get 

and if I did get a present it would be a hand-me-down 

Yo I got this for Christmas now how that sound 



[Special K:] 

It sounds good to me cause I'm about to freeze 

you wanna see something look at the bottom of these 

me and brothers can't go out at the same time 

cause a coat that's theirs is a coat that's mine 



[Kool Moe Dee:] 

Man I know one thing y'all better get off my neck 

and wait till you get ya welfare check 

go on down to the office and stand in the line 

better hurry up see I got mine 



[Chorus:] 

Jingle, Jangle, Jingle for the po 

and once you get your welfare check 

Yo kiss my mistletoe 

Ho Ho Ho 

Ho Ho Ho 



[L.A. Sunshine:] 

That's why the presents keep getting mixed up 

cause year after year you keep fucking up 

and now I know why cause you always drunk 

instead of G.I. Joe you send me this junk 



[Special K:] 

That ain't a G.I. Joe that's a G.I. jerk 

with a kungfu grip that don't even work 

so all I did was just put him away 

cause my G.I. Joe looked G.I. gay 



[Kool Moe Dee:] 

That's why you don't get presents now 

cause you're just ingrates 

if the G.I. Joe is gay what difference does it make 

after all he's just a doll ain't too much he can do 

if you ask me boy I ain't to sure about 



[L.A. Sunshine:] 

Listen bloato in your big fat suit 

next time say no don't send no substitute 

cause I asked you for a beatbox and you know what I got? 

Dougie Fresh, you know that kid from down the block 



[Dougie Fresh: beatboxing] 



[Special K:] 

For a fascimile we must admit 

Dougie Fresh was good and made a perfect fit 

He's the only reason why we weren't totally mad 

Without Dougie our Christmas would've been really sad 



[Kool Moe Dee:] 

Well let's get Doug E. Fresh and Magnificent Force 

and head on out the do 

and leave these partypeople singing 

Jingle, Jangle for the po 

Sing