I was flippin' through the channels

A lazy Sunday afternoon

Caught the race in Talladega

Comin' 'round lap 22



When the fella in the blue car

Gave a red car a little tap

Then the rainbow colors

Went flippin' down the track

In what that announcer called

A spectacular crash



And I thought

Well, hell, I can do that

What's the big deal?

Hit a wall in a ball of fire

Requires no steel



A hundred thousand fans

Screamin' in the stands

He gets a bag full of cash

Drivin' circles and crash

Hell, I can do that



While they were under caution

I switched it back to the football game

My team was losin'

Coach was hangin' his head in shame



Then they gave 30 to the football

And he hit the hole fast

'Tween him and the goal line

Was nothin' but the grass

And he tripped on his own two feet

Fell flat on his back



And I said

Oh, hell, I can do that

Man, what's the big deal?

If I only wanted

A stumblin', fumblin' skills



A hundred thousand fans

Screamin' in the stands

He gets a bag full of cash

And sit out the second half

Hell, I can do that



Well, I must have dozed off

I woke up with my baby next to me

Remote in her hand

Tears in her eyes from a movie

A romantic comedy

Starring Matthew McConaughey



Oh, hell, baby

I can do that

I don't see the big deal

Kiss a girl, save the world

And the monster ain't even real



He just takes off his shirt

Stuntman does the work

He gets a boat load of cash

For a quick shot of his ass

Hell, I can do that



Might need to wax my back

But, hell, I can do that