Two miles from the hotel, eight hundred from home
We're forced to call on all we know
But all we know's a joke
The van just started shaking, coughing out black smoke
We're pulling off in a parking lot cause this might just explode
Cause it's New Year's Eve and four degrees
We're stranded, hopeless
I just want some sleep
Drew's too busy sexting with some girl he met last show
Tripping balls from the soft effects of a Nyquil overdose
Nobody's been asking how we're gonna get home
Cause we all know
We'll deal with it tomorrow
Yeah, we know

It's gonna be our year, boys
I'd speak up
But I'm waiting for the irony to fall asleep without me
And we'll wait and see
With some luck and patching up
I think I'll be home this week

We'll deal with it our own way
And we'll stay, and we'll wait,
And we'll wake in this awkward mess we made
A landscape forged from pizza crust
And what's left of a case
We'll make friends in every state
Like the cops in the parking lot
Or staff of Steak'N'Shake

It's gonna be our year, boys
I'd speak up
But I'm waiting for the irony to fall asleep without me
And we'll wait and see
With some luck and patching up
I think I'll be home this week

But I'm too tired to speak
I'll say, "Hey man, I'll see you in Cleveland"

Someone go tell the universe we're not concerned
We know that it's out to get us
But we'll never learn
So if you're thinking you just got the best of me
Man, we don't go down that easy

It's gonna be our year, boys
I'd speak up
But I'm waiting for the irony to fall asleep without me
And we'll wait and see
With some luck and patching up
I think I'll be home this week