Call me morbid, call me pale 
I've spent six years on your trail 
Six long years 
On your trail 
Call me morbid, call me pale 
I've spent six years on your trail 
Six full years of my life on your trail 

And if you have five seconds to spare 
Then I'll tell you the story of my life : 
Sixteen, clumsy and shy 
I went to London and I 
I booked myself in at the Y ... W.C.A. 
I said : "I like it here - can I stay ? 
I like it here - can I stay ? 
Do you have a vacancy 
For a Back-scrubber?"

She was left behind, and sour 
And she wrote to me, equally dour 
She said : "In the days when you were 
Hopelessly poor 
I just liked you more..." 

And if you have five seconds to spare 
Then I'll tell you the story of my life : 
Sixteen, clumsy and shy 
I went to London and I 
I booked myself in at the Y ... W.C.A. 
I said : "I like it here - can I stay ? 
I like it here - can I stay ? 
And do you have a vacancy 
For a Back-scrubber ?"

Call me morbid, call me pale 
I've spent too long on your trail 
Far too long 
Chasing your tail 
Oh ... 

And if you have five seconds to spare 
Then I'll tell you the story of my life : 
Sixteen, clumsy and shy 
That's the story of my life 
Sixteen, clumsy and shy 
The story of my life 
That's the story of my life 
That's the story of my life 
That's the story of my life 
The story of my life 
That's the story of my life 
That's the story of my life 
That's the story of my life 
That's the story of my life 
That's the story of my life 
That's the story ...