Well, I fed your dog while you were on vacation 

Covered all your shifts for you operation 

But when you got back 

You still wouldn't show me your brand new silicone boobs 



So I took a walk around my neighborhood 

To get you off of my mind like I knew that I ought to 

But when I saw a big black van 

Run down a bird I had to think about you 



But no I'm not a quarterback 

I'm not a fireman 

Still I can have any girl in Japan 

Cause I'm a healthy, hundred and fifty nine pound American boy... 

Yeah you tell a story like a broken record and 

You tell a story like a broken record and 

I tell a story like a broken record but 

Still I ain't jealous of the fellas like you, like anyway 



So you took another guy on that Caribbean cruise 

While I stayed home and cried into my bottle of pills but 

When you got back 

You didn't even have yourself a tan cause you stayed in your room 



So I fed your dog while you were out of town and 

I mowed your lawn when he wasn't around but 

When you got back 

You had the nerve to ask me if I had gone through some your clothes 



No I'm not a quarterback 

I'm not a fireman 

Still I can have any girl in Japan 

Cause I'm a healthy, hundred and fifty nine pound American boy... 

Yeah you tell a story like a broken record and 

You tell a story like a broken record and 

I tell a story like a broken record but 

Still I ain't jealous of the fellas like you, like anyway 



No I'm not a quarterback 

I'm not a fireman 

Still I can have any girl in Japan 

Cause I'm a healthy, hundred and fifty nine pound American boy... 

Yeah you tell a story like a broken record and 

I tell a story like a broken record and 

We tell a story like a broken record but 

Still I ain't jealous of the fellas like you like 

You tell a story like a broken record and 

I tell a story like a broken record and 

I like stories like a broken record but 

Still I ain't jealous of the fellas like you, like anyway