My wife laments-I drink! I'm crass!
Plug my teenage daughter in the ---
Please do not of house chores, dearest, speak
Cuz the truck pull derby is this week
I'm a scumbag-I know what I like
Plodding loony on my Harley D. bike
Bowling league and a dozen beer runs
Snowmobiling over bunnies is fun
My four-wheeler is 60 feet high
"jack" and Cokes in the morning, spouse cries
Poaching wildlife for personal gain
Gunaholic commie-hatin' insane!
When I get all hostile, in a snit
I'm true blue dirtball-I am true grit!
When I shine my piece it gets real stiff
I'm a nasty, ass-kickin' prick when I get miffed!
Shooting pool at "White Trash Magnet Lanes"

Flirt with boozy, sleazy, bleachy dames
I was weaned on my dad's sphincter ring
Ten years old before I said a thing
I'm a redneck-I know what I like
Death for fudge-packin' homos and dykes
Equal rights for the wenches? No way!
Mother, guts, God and Ronnie's OK
Got a case of Pabst soaked in me gourd
Got my "Action Slacks" from Montgomery Wards
Poaching wildlife for personal gain
Gunaholic commie-hatin' insane!
When I get all hostile, in a snit
I'm true blue dirtball-I am true grit!
When I shine my piece it gets real stiff
I'm a nasty, ass-kickin' prick when I get miffed!