Has anybody here seen a chick called dickHe looks real burly but he’s really hipHe’s six feet tall and his arms are all brown and hairyWell, he married betty lou back in ’65 when you had to be butch to surviveBut lately he’s been looking at his wife with mixed emotionsYou see, he’s not a common place closet queenHe shouldn’t be hidden, he should be seen’cos when he puts on that dressHe looks like a princessThe day he came out of the wardrobeBetty lou got quite a surpriseShe didn’t know whether she should get angry or not bat an eyeShe really couldn’t call up her motherMama would positively dieShould she go or stay or should she try to get a trial separationYou see, he’s not a faggot as you might supposeHe just feels restricted in conventional clothes’cos when he puts on that dress, he feels like a princessHe’s not a dandy, he’s only living out a fantasyHe’s not a pansy, he’s only being what he wants to beNow his life is rearranged and he’s grateful for the changeHe’s out of the wardrobe and now he’s got no regretsBetty lou didn’t know what to do at firstBut she’s learning how to cope at lastShe’s got the best of both worldsAnd she’s really in a state of elationShe says it helps their relationshipShe says a change is as good as a restAnd their friends finally coming ’round to their way of thinkingShe wears the trousers and smokes the pipeAnd he washes upShe helps him wipe’cos when he puts on that dressHe looks like a princessHe’s out of the wardrobe and he’s feeling alrightHe’s out of the wardrobe and he’s feeling satisfiedNow it’s farewell to the pastThe secret’s out at lastHe’s out of the wardrobe and now he’s got no regrets