ive been feeling dull as a coat hanger pretty as a picture of a patient on a fresh iv 

giddy as a gangbanger with a set of sutres where his magic johnson ought to be



yes i'll tell you just the thing you need to be the next big thing

lets start in with a test of your intelligence and zest for the counter productive

up and down and roundabout and out the back and keep your mouth shut

tight the lights are staying out but no sweat ive got aim like a mack truck

guess how many fingers ok guess how many more i can fit there

guess right get the toaster but you know miss guessing gets you nowhere



i've been baking cakes for the enemy

i've been dying to find out the hard way

ive been taking friends to the alleyway

two down now but whos counting anyway?



yes i can do everything you need from out of my S U V

my work is garunteed to last the length of your recovery 

put away those pliers honey trust me cause i know the options

how about a nine-month long vacation and a two-foot coffin



i've been getting up close and intimate

some close calls but oh im getting into it

in some states i heard you can burn for it

but ill burn that bridge when i get to it



it's not a bad thing

to get proffesional

its got a nice ring

mandy goes to med school



i've been taking tips from the government

ive been getting damn good at hiding it

fifty bucks a month ought to cover it

two down now but whos gonna notice it?



if you show up and i am unavailable

my partner Brian would love to take care of you



he is a nice man

fairly relaible

he's in a rockband

and he goes to medschool

and he goes to medschool

and he goes to medschool