It's probably the cruelest thing they ever did to me
I thought a long time about changing my name
But I found a better way to deal with my shame
My buddies and me formed a band
We're gonna be famous, you understand

We're lookin' for a drummer
Or someone with a van
Our hair is getting longer
But the most important thing is namin' the band
Namin' the band

We studied all the pictures in metal magazine
My lycra makes me sing real high, my mom thinks its obscene
We've got our own equipment and a great rehearsal space
All we need's a heavy name to throw in your face
My buddies and me formed a band
We're gonna be famous, you understand

We're lookin' for a drummer
Or someone with a van
Our hair is getting longer
But the most important thing is namin' the band
Namin' the band

We were gonna call ourselves Elvis Hitler but
   someone beat us to the punch
Maybe we should be the Butthole Surfers, or
   how 'bout Chuck 'n Lunch
Names with meaning and attitude aren't easy to find
So we're hanging out... asking each other "How about?..."

We should be writing tunes
and learning where to stand
Instead we're spending all our time
Doing nothing but ... naming the band