I have sailed the world 

Beheld its wonders 

From the Dardanelles to the mountains of Peru 

But, there's no place like London! 



MR. TODD: 

No, there's no place like London! 



ANTONY: 

(spoken) Mr. Todd? 



MR. TODD: 

You are young 

Life has been kind to you 

You will learn. 



There's a hole in the world, 

Like a great black pit. 

And the vermin of the world inhabit it 

And its morals aren't worth what a pig could spit 

And it goes by the name of London 



At the top of the hole sit a privileged few 

Making mock of the vermin of the lower zoo 

turning beauty into filth and greed 

I too have sailed the world and seen its wonders 

For the cruelty of men is as wondrous as Peru 

But there's no place like London! 



ANTONY: 

(Spoken) Is everything alright, Mr. Todd? 



MR. TODD: 

(Spoken) 

I beg your indulgence, Antony. 

My mind is far from easy. 

In these once familiar streets, I feel shadows, everywhere. 



(Sung) 

There was a barber and his wife 

And she was beautiful 

A foolish barber and his wife 

She was his reason and his life 

And she was beautiful 

And she was virtuous 

And he was…naive 



There was another man who saw 

That she was beautiful 

A pious vulture of the law 

Who with the gesture of his claw 

Removed the barber from his plate 

Then there was nothing but to wait 

And she would fall, so soft 

So young, 

So lost, 

And oh, so beautiful 



ANTONY: 

(spoken) 

And the lady, sir. Did she succumb? 



TODD: 

(sung) 

Oh, that was many years ago 

I doubt if anyone would know 



(spoken) 

I'd like to thank you, Antony. 

If you hadn't spotted me, I'd be lost in the ocean still. 



ANTONY: 

(Spoken) 

Will I see you again? 



TODD: 

(spoken) 

You might find if you'd like. 

Around Fleet Street I wouldn't wonder. 



ANTONY: 

(spoken) 

Until then, my friend. 



TODD: 

There's a hole in the world like a great black pit 

And it's filled with people who are filled with shit 

And the vermin of the world inhabit it.