It was just like a dream, yeah, a surreal scene, like a blue orange

I thought my senses had gone, like i was writing a song about a foot-long

syringe

And she said, "Hello, dear, it's my party

                       "So i hope you'll be smart, hee hee

And i said,"I don't know, but i think I'll go fix me a stiff drink"



Well, I sat there and stared, because at first i was scared of this female

Tarzan

And while she talked with the apes about champagne and grapes, i approached her

garden

And she said,"Now, now, don't try to leave me,

                      "It's unfair to deceive me

                      "I could kill if you try to escape me, come upstairs my friend"



Now i knew, i knew, i couldn't be that mean,

so i tried, yeah i really tried to leave her but she was a

big, big, big, big girl, big girl



Hurled out  the door, it was becoming more of a test of honour

Would i go, would i stay, could i do it all day and be a certain gonnor

And she said,"Now you're so young and tender,

                      "And don't be concerned with my gender

It was hard but i managed to send her away up to those fluffy white clouds



It was hard on the brain but I would do it again for the satisfaction

She weighed 203 but that was OK by me, there was lots of action

And she said,"Shall we dance in the moonlight

                      "It would be so nice on a June night

But i said,"If it's OK by you, I'll just sit here a take me a rest"