And I work the night shift all week long
Freddy on a chainsaw lost his feet
Thinking 'bout a blonde he'll never meet
Tried to take his life again the other week
Keep your chin up, haven't a care 'ave you?
Just join the party, allegiance I swear

What's the matter with Arthur Royal
I'll go and top up his batteries and check the oil
Arthur blew a fuse two days ago,
Set himself alight, you didn't know
Nearly burnt us down the twit just had to go
Take your chances, live on hot air
Chance of promotion, I'll take that chair

Dreaming of golden sands and palm trees
I said file these quickly and then staple these
Get yourself altered undo the seam, get back just
In time for tea (and don't be late mind)

Nobody's perfect least of all me
Married the job at age 23
Just keep my nose clean egg chips and beans
I'm always full of steam

(I could never go to Butlins
 But I did manage to go to Majorca once
 Wish I hadn't bothered
 Past the entrance, by-way to all my sins

 Who are all these people in my office, anyway?
 Who are they? Where do they come from, do you know them