The Man on the Flying Trapeze
(As performed by Doodles Weaver)
As the crowd roars, to the center ring steps our fractured baritone.
Are you in voice Winstead?
I believe I am in voice.
(pitch pipe)
*sings out of tune* OOOWWWWWOOOOO
Professor?
(pitch pipe)
*sings out of tune* OOOWWWWWOOOOO
Ohhh..... hunce I was wappy uh, Once I was sappy uh,  Sap I was wussy... no,
No, no...
Once I was happy, buts now I borlorn, uh,
Lorn I fow mow, uh,  Sigh on lie now, uh, Nylons are free.... No, no...
Now I'm forlorn...
(pitch pipe)
*sings out of tune* OOOWWWWWOOOOO
Like an old goat... Oh no, not a goat, that's an animal.
Like an old coat that is tornered and tat, uh.... teetered and tonned,
Uh... tattered and tipped, uh... tap with a toupee, uh... ripped!
(pitch pipe)
*sings out of tune* OOOWWWWWOOOOO
Left in this wide world to sleep and to snore, uh... to weep and to mourn,
Betreaned by a jade in her means. No. Bemeaned by a trade for some
Jeans.
No. Bejeaned by a teen with some jade. No. Betrayed by a maid in her
Teens.
OOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH...................
He floats by his hair. Ooh. Not by his hair. That would hurt!
Speaking of hair, a man came up to me and said,