Oooh! Never hit your Grandma with a shovel
It makes a bad impression on her mind
(On her mind)
In a better way impart
All the love things in your heart
For it's possible she may retort in kind
(Retort in kind)
Remember Granny's known you since a baby
And even though in fun, could prove a shock
(Prove a shock)
So respect her aged head,
Stay the shovel and instead
Paste your dear old, sweet old Grandma
With a rock.

A Grandma, with her grandchild,
Sat by the kitchen door
Of a quaint old fashioned house built long ago
The little lass grew restless
As on the evening wore
"I must do something" cried the girl,
And seized the nearby spade
But a passing stranger blocked her swing
Whilst these wise words he said

Oh! Never hit your Grandma with a shovel
It makes a bad impression on her mind
In a better way impart
All the love things in your heart
For it's possible she may retort in kind
Remember Granny's known you since a baby
And even though in fun, could prove a shock
(Prove a shock)
So respect her aged head,
Stay the shovel and instead
Paste your dear old, sweet old Grandma
With a rock.
(A great big rock)