that was the time when, if i hadn't been so stupid and 
distant i could have saved us. we drove there, and i 
didn't want to stay. anxious to get back to my solitude. 
how stupid to want to be away from you. driving a way 
from the greatest comfort i'd ever had. watching you say 
"goodbye," and "i love you." i am so stupid. i was so 
FUCKING stupid. i was SO FUCKING STUPID. and God, i love 
you. God i love you.