Don't play football

We play Fenders

We chop fish in kitchen blenders

We're a disgrace to our gender

We're the men!



Always together night and day

It makes our girlfriends think we're gay

But who needs women when you've got friends?

We're the men!



The men will never let me down

The men will always be around

The men won't argue, scratch, or fight

The men won't say, "I've got a headache tonight"!



On Friday night we'll all jump in a car

And blow all our money at a go-go bar

Sober up for a week to do it over again because

We're the men!



We're twenty-one, but we act like we're ten

We're as immature as we've ever been

Maybe we'll grow up, but I don't know when because

We're the men!



We'll get together

Drink together

Sweat together

Stink together

Laugh together

Cry together

Live together

And die together!



We're the men