Whatever happened, did it happen to us?
And whatever happened to Dolly Parton's bust?
And whatever happened to our favorite show?
And whatever happened to Michael Jackson's nose?
Well, I think I liked things better the way they were!
That's right, uh-huh
That's right, uh-huh
Whatever happened to the way you wore your hair? (What 
hair, skinhead?)
And whatever happened to Sonny and Cher? (They've got 
your hair, babe!)
And whatever happened to butt floss bikinis?
And whatever happened to Shirley Feeney?
Well, I think I liked things better the way they were!
That's right, uh-huh
That's right, uh-huh
Whatever happened to our favorite food? (TUNA!)
And whatever happened to Vanna White in the nude? (Tuna? 
Yeah, tuna)
And whatever happened to the drive-in movie?
And whatever happened to feelin' groovy?
Well, I think I liked things better the way they were!
That's right, uh-huh
That's right, uh-huh