(David Yazbek)
Everytime you have a picnic, the rain comes down
And the birdies in the trees all stop, when
You're around.
All you gotta do is show up, and spirits sag.
Why you such a drag?  You big wet rag.
All I wanted was a good time, to have some fun.
All I wanted was a picnic in the summer sun.
Maybe listen to some Beach Boys, maybe play some tag.
But you put it in the bag, you big wet rag.
And sometimes everybody's gonna want attention.
You really push the envelope, a new dimension
Make a joke about a picnic, you ask me why.
I say in order to be funny, then you start to cry.
I've been stepping on these eggshells, but they always crack.
Everytime I make a gag, you beg wet rag.
I tell you everybody sometimes wants attention.
But time with you's a bumpy drive on bad suspension.
(Stomach clenchin', Too much tension!)
When I think about a picnic, I think of love.
When you think about a picnic, you think of bugs.
Next time someone gives a picnic, I'm going stag.
Well it rhymes with rag, you big wet rag.
I never seen your tail wag, you big wet rag.
All you ever do is nag, nag, nag, you big wet rag.
So I'm calling you a big wet rag, you big wet--