(Willy Braun)



(All right, kids, uh, I don't really know

what you guys are going to think of this.

It's, umm, maybe a bit. OFF THE WALL, uhh?

Fictional. So. uh, you may not like it,

but you'll find it amusing, at... at least.)



Well, it sure didn't take too long

I woke up this morning she was gone

And the note that she wrote didn't say "Dear John"

It said, "Goodbye, sucker, I'm gone."



She was a home-grown mountain girl

Raised in a different world

I was a wanna-be rocker, she was more into Merle

And I couldn't see it just wouldn't work.



And now I'm double fisting longnecks

And grapefruit and Stoli

But I'm never getting over Joelie.



Well, I poured myself in my car

I drove it on down to the bar

But they wouldn't let me in 'cause I ain't a movie star

So I went to the Horseshoe on Lamar.



The bouncer threw me out at two

And I didn't know what to do

So I picked up the phone and I called, guess who?

But the call block wouldn't let me through.



And now I'm wishing for some drugs

Or a shrink to console me

But I'm never gettin' over Joelie.



Well, I gathered up all my guns

And a pipe bomb just for fun

And I drove to her house and parked on the lawn

She's right, I always was a crazy one.



Well, her boyfriend was sure nice to me

He said, "Calm down, would you like a drink?"

And then I shot him full of holes from his nose to his knees

And I polished off my little sweet pea.



And I'm crying on me knees

Feeling dirty and unholy

But I'm never getting over Joelie.



Now I'll probably get life

And serve at least forty

But I'm never getting over Joelie...