Ferris wheels and bumper cars are fun

But those rides just aren't for everyone

Bought my ticket I'ma have a run

In the maze (WHOOOO!)

If I don't come back or right away

Give me time at least a half a day

Don't just leave me lost and blown away

In the maze (WHOOOO!)

Hello ladies and gentlemen I'm Jeff Nipple

And I'm Jimbo Jizm 

Welcome to the Dark Carnival's amazing maze

Over 5000 ways to get in, and no way out

Let's meet today's volunteer

This is Rick

We like to call him Rick the Dick

Dickface here is a wealthy entrepeneur

Who smacks his wife around

And buys his way in and out of everything

Let's see how Mr. Toughguy fairs up in the amazing maze



[Violent J]

What up bitch? I'm Violent J

I'll be your guide for today, k?

Good, got mad doors and mad floors

Hallways, crawlways, walls for nedens

Make a left just before you make a right

And your left should be to your right

If your lefts right, right?

Good, begin the show 

Go on ahead boy and open up the first door

Welcome to a theatrical thriller

Meet Jack Doobie a serial killer

With a chainsaw, he takes your arm at the elbow

You get it back if you make it out though

Fuck ain't no use crying all day

You need to take your bitch ass back down the hallway

You gotta be a man at least you learned

Everything you get in the maze you've earned

Keep runnin times a tickin on the clock

You might wanna tie that stump up with a sock

Turn right it might look the same

But you makin tracks through the room of thumbtacks

This really ain't shit

About a million tacks and the room spins a bit

If you stay on your feet you'll be okay

Oh let me get out of your way

Oh boy Rick the Dick is in a bit of a jam there Jeff

That's right Jimbo

He looks like a ragdoll flippin and spinnin like that

You can always witness spectacles truly amazing 

Within the amazing maze

Let's see where else Rick's adventures

Will lead the little dickwipe

Hahaha, so you got a few tacks in your balls

Pick 'em all out and head right back down the halls

What's this? Dead end, doors locked 

It's a long way back, just knock

Oh should've turned around no doubt

Ain't nuthin that we got to sit and argue about

Keep going make a left, right left

Now run straight ahead some more

Open up the door

Slide in the sheets, nice breeze

Relax ninja take it with ease

The maze is a place of magic

Many surprises, your dick rises

Lay down expect the best

In comes your lover with a hairy chest

Hello sexy I'm grim love

Let me have a look at your uhh milk dud

Aww shit you fell for that

I ain't gonna tell you got your hole ring tapped

All that dissin of the opposite sex

And look who just got they butthole flexed

Wait! What's that? 

The walls are closing in, fuck dat

Hurry run for your life 

Ohh he'll be alright

How's that sit with you Jimbo?

First he gets plugged with bullets

Then he gets his butt plugged

I think he's a fuckin idiot, Jeff

I mean what kind of asshole

Can't find his way out of this maze?

You gotta be a real dickbuffer

To wind up here in the first place

Right you are Jimbo 

Let's watch the big dick fuck up some more

Alrighty ain't no need to fear

If there's a way out it's gotta be near

Hey yo look a phone

You still got one good arm so it's on

Can you hear? Ahh tongue in your ear

Drop it the phones got a life of it's own

Kiss me man hey come on

Slip down the slide go faster

Bed of nails, disaster

Quit screaming yo, hurry the fuck up and open the door

Woods, trees you're outside

Lots of places for creeps to hide

Watch your step, AHHHH, backdraft

Caught your foot and the ankles left

Creepin off with your stump

Feel something in the rump

Holla's, yeah they gonna get you 

How does it feel bitch get the picture

Back indoors hey at last 

Look at your family behind the glass

They look weird, they're sayin something

Listen up, you've fucked up, you've fucked up

Oooh they're laughin and they're pointing at you

At least you know what they're sayins true

It's one last door you made it home, or

Or what? Once again it's on

Ferris wheels and bumper cars are fun

But those rides just aren't for everyone

Bought my ticket I'ma have a run

In the maze (WHOOOO!)

If I don't come back or right away (Hey)

Hey man cut that shit

What the fuck man, happy friendly shit man

Fuck dat

It's supposed to be wicked in this bitch man

Turn that shit off