Hey dude, we get it, you're cooler than us
You drove your father's El Camino while we all took the bus
There was a time, there was a place when you meant something to me
But time has shown and now I know that we were wrong and you will always be
A prick
A fake, your parents' greatest mistake
You're the height of all douche-baggery, it's too much to take
But damn you look so cool in steel-point shoes
And when you've got so much ed hardy it must be hard for you to choose

Cause you're your own biggest fan and the only one you've got
Nobody think it's cool when you peel out in the parking lot
Of your high school where you graduated six years ago
Hey dude, hey bro, you will always be a douchebag
(Douche, douche, douche, douche, douchebag)
You will always be a douchebag
(Douche, douche, douche, douche, douchebag)
You will always be a douchebag
(Douche, douche, douche, douche, douchebag)
You will always be a douchebag
(Douche, douche, douche, douche, douchebag)

Hey bro, we get it, your style is sick
I know cause you went shirtless in your profile pic
You took it off while at a party to show your tattoos
At the beer pong table where you never lose

Cause you're your own biggest fan and the only one you've got
Nobody think it's cool when you peel out in the parking lot
Of your high school where you graduated six years ago

Hey dude, hey bro, you will always be a douchebag
(Douche, douche, douche, douche, douchebag)
You will always be a douchebag
(Douche, douche, douche, douche, douchebag)

There's a nine in ten chance you've got a tribal tattoo
Girl says damn that boy can dance, now he's a rival to you
Hit the beach but never swim wearing jeans in the gym
In to every club you go it's fourloko, fourloko

Take a protein shake with a jager bomb shot
Tell your best friend Blake you think his mother is hot (his mother is hot)
Drinking Jose all day party in here
You drink mad beers

Every night I pray to God that you never reproduce
The last thing that we need on this earth is someone like you
It's not high school, man, you graduated six years ago
Hey dude, hey bro, you will always be a douchebag
(Douche, douche, douche, douche, douchebag)
You will always be a douchebag
(Douche, douche, douche, douche, douchebag)
You will always be a douchebag
(Douche, douche, douche, douche, douchebag)
You will always be a douchebag
(Douche, douche, douche, douche, douchebag)

Dude! (Dude! )
I'm not your bro
(I'm not your bro)
Dude! (Dude! )
I'm not your bro-o-o-o
Dude! (Dude! )
I'm not your bro
(I'm not your bro)
Dude! (Dude! )
I'm not your bro-o-o-o