They call me Mr. Carbohydrate 

It's the only thing I can digest 

Xenophobia or general disinterest 

I must catch up with all this stuff 



They call me a boring fuckhead 

They say I might as well work in a bank 

I tell them I wish I was, they tell me that I'm sick in the head 

They say that I'm sick in the head 



They call me Mr. Carbohydrate 

They call me Mr. Inadequate 

They call me Mr. Paranoia 

They call me Mr. Hypochondria 



Have you heard of Matthew Maynard 

He's my favourite cricketer 

I would rather watch him play than pick up my guitar 

Than play with my guitar 



People tell me I should get out more 

But the TV is my best friend 

Cynicism is the only thing that keeps me sane 

The only thing that keeps me sane 



They call me Mr. Carbohydrate 

They call me Mr. Inadequate 

They call me Mr. Paranoia 

They call me Mr. Hypochondria 



Sometimes I just stay in bed 

And think about the day 

When I can retire, forgetting everything 

I'll forget everything 

Forget everything 

Forever but not today 

When I cannot, cannot say 

No more yesterdays 

No more yesterdays