I bought a recordplayer dressed like a suitcase
Move the slide and it will show it’s true face
It’s got a speaker, a plug and a switch
It looks great and the sound is rich

But it runs too slow, it runs too fast
It’s got a pulse but nonetheless
It’s either too fast, or it’s too slow
It’s all I’ll ever know

I changed the needle, tightened a screw
Asked a mechanic what to do
I pressed some buttons, I changed the tone
But this machine’s got a mind of it’s own

I made some calls, learned a great deal
About how my new purchase must feel
I understand now it don’t need a fix
For I am too from ’76