The filkers are attacking our beautiful Technese

Complaining 'cause we talk out software anywhere we please

They're drowning in their filkzines so they've got a lot of nerve

I think another music program's just what they deserve



Chorus:	 Calm down, it's only eighths and quarters

	 Calm down, it's only lines and staffs

	 Calm down and put it in assembly

	 It's not my fault I have a voice at which the world just laughs



They sit around for hours with guitars in every lap

The other filkers all applaud them even when it's crap

With rhymes and times and little chimes and dimes for jukebox play

I'd trade a hundred filkers for a mainframe any day



The filking faction's growing they're in consuites through the land

And some of the fanatic ones will write them on demand

I'd rather be a renegade and program all I can

And I don't care if they complain my programs never scan



I think I'll make a program to write some filks for me

And sing them in a pretty voice across my new T.V.

I'll set up in the corner of the filking in consuite

And if I do it well I'll make all filkers obsolete



Chorus:	 Calm down, it's only words and music

	 Calm down, it's only notes and chords

	 Give up I'll never learn to sing it

	 If you persist I'll send you to your ultimate reward

	 I'd rather program any day than sit here being bored

	 I'll never have a voice unless it's programmed in and stored, oh no

	





Words and music:  Kathy Mar



Copyright 1985 Kathy Mar