My wife Mary made a lovely shepherds pie & peas
With carrots and gravy, oh and cabbage as an additional 
green
I said that looks fantastic love and I tucked in 
hungrily
My daughter Karen didn't, something I wish I'd seen
For soon my plate was empty, I said “Mary, is there any 
more?”
She said “No, love, but its treacle sponge for afters” 
and I said “phwoar”
I'd had a couple of mouthfuls, when I heard Karen 
declare
“I can't eat any more of this shepherds pie mum”
Well it filled me with despair.
(because if I'd known that I wouldn't have started my 
sweet)
Chorus.
But I can't go back to savoury now
That shepherd's pie was stunning
But I'm, halfway through my pudding
I can't go back to savoury now
My taste buds would go crazy
And I can't go back to savoury now
(‘caus you can't can you?)
My tummy was in turmoil, I was panicked and confused
And as Karen's dinner grew colder, so did my sweet
For my pleasure in that treacle sponge was now 
massively reduced
By the sight of fluffy potato, and glistening meat
Take this plate from me Oh Lord, before I go insane
Should I press on with my afters, or go back to my 
main?
Oh I can't go back to savoury now
That shepherd's pie was stunning
But I'm, halfway through my pudding
I can't go back to savoury now, Oh No
My taste buds would go crazy
And I can't go back to savoury now
I can't go back, I won't go back
I'd love to go back but I mustn't do that
I can't go back, I won't go back
I'd love to go back obviously, but I mustn't do that
At that moment I heard a sound, a scrape of knife on 
plate
As I watched Karen's dinner go in the dog's dish
My appetite now gone, my pudding suffered the same fate
I can only assume this appalling outcome,
Was God's wish
‘Cause I can't go back to savoury now
I can't go back to savoury now
That shepherd's pie was stunning
But I'm, halfway through my pudding
I can't go back to savoury now
My taste buds would go crazy
And I can't go back to savoury now
I can't go back to savouryÂ… now