I'm a Very Important Person 

I park in the V.I.P

And when I go to the bathroom,

i go in the V.I.P toilet

And when I wanna change a lightbulb,

I don't do it myself... Oooohhh no...

I have a technician

Cause I'm a V.I.P

I'm a V.I.P

I'm a V.I.P

I'm a V.I.P 

Now, as I began to become a V.I.P,

i forgot what i've become a V.I.P for

I began to grow accustomed to people saying

"Right this way sir...drinks are on the house..."

Flight attendants on airplanes saying :



"Please...Really, I don't wanna bother you sir, but it's such a pleasure to have you on board.

May I have your autograph for my daughter ?"

"Yeah baby right after I go to the toilet

I i'll give you a couple of'em

Cause i'm a V.I.P!"



Now,one thing about V.I.P is,is they never seem to be alone

Ooohh no !

The "true" V.I.P must travel with an entourage !

People who say "Right on boss"

Cause it's a V.I.P!

Right on boss

I'm a V.I.P!

As i began to realise that i had gained V.I.P status,

worries began to creep in

What if one day,i woke up,and i was no longer a V.I.P ?

No more good tables at the restaurants...

No more strange women smiling and approaching me on the streets...

No more top notch booty

No more entourage to say "Right boss"

I began to have nightmares

And in my nightmares, I was just a fucking nobody.

Laying at the beach, imagining myself being a VIP !

Just like i was before...

Hearing the applause in my head 

Beautiful warm embraces of superior members of the female gender...



V.I.P

V.I.P



Of course, when one becomes a V.I.P,

One meets other V.I.Ps

At social occasions...

And one inevitably thinks :

"thck ! How shallow and crass these people are !

They're not down to earth and real like me...

Oooohhh no ! I'm a very special V.I.P"



Another interesting phenomenon, associated with V.I.P celebrityhood, is the "V.I.P reflection effect", during which anyone associated with the V.I.P, becomes a sort of V.I.P in their own right ! Such as "son OF the V.I.P",

"guitar player FOR the V.I.P",

"girlfriend WITH the V.I.P",

"accountants of the V.I.P"

The maid, the dog, the music publisher ...huh !

All enjoy a sort of 'reflected glory', as in..



"Hi this is Nastea

I work for Iggy

And i'd like 6 tables tonight in the V.I.P section

And he needs passes for everyone

And free drinks of course

In the V.I.P area"

Right on boss

Cause i'm a V.I.P.

It's also true that when one is a V.I.P, everybody's happy to see you... All the time !

And there's an implicit rule that a V.I.P must never- never

Be on a barn.

Cause everybody expects YOU to make their day

And they're all be on to you if you're in a bad mood.

They will "thck!tchk!tchk ! mur mur mur mur mur!",

And you will find yourself with the wrong kind of attention:

A "difficult" V.I.P.

Psychologists tell us that a sense of self-esteem

Is so necessary in today's world.

As a V.I.P, I can guarantee you, you'll never be alone.

You'll never be alone.

Cause you're a V.I.P!