Ladies and gentlemen

The host of phat, uhh, Phat or Wack?

Uhh your friend and mine

Bink Chipperwink (Applause)

Hello everybody

I'm Bink Chipperwink

And this is Phat or Wack!

The rules are simple

Each one of our teams will play music

From their upcoming album

And the studio audience will judge by applause

Now let's meet our contestants

Team number 1 from the Southwest side of Detroit

They are Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope

The Insane Clown Posse (Boo!)

And team number 2 from the East side of Detroit

They are Jamie Madrox and the Monoxide Child

Twiztid (Boo!)

Now let's play Phat or Wack

Alright team number 1 first

The Insane Clown Posse, are you ready?

Yeah, yeah I'm ready Bink, we ready

What song are you gonna play for us?

Terrible, naww umm

Fuck the world, yeah yeah

Uhh, Bink Fuck the World, yup

Ladies and gentlemen

This is Insane Clown Posse Fuck the World

It's your turn to judge

Phat or Wack?





Fuck, fuck that shit

Fuck give it to me

If I only could I'd set the world on fire (x3)

Say fuck the world 

FUCK THE WORLD!

Fuck 'em all

FUCK 'EM ALL

Fuck you, fuck me, fuck us

Fuck Tom, fuck Mary, fuck Gus

Fuck Dairius

Fuck the West coast

And fuck everybody on the East

Eat shit and die

Or fuck off at least

Fuck pre-schoolers, fuck rulers

Kings and queens and gold jewelers

Fuck wine coolers

Fuck chickens, fuck ducks

Everybody in your crew sucks

Punk muthafucks

Fuck critics, fuck your review

Even if you like me, FUCK YOU!

Fuck your Mom, fuck your Mom's Mama

Fuck the Beastie Boys and the Daili Llama

Fuck the rain forest, fuck a Forest Gump

You probably like it in the rump

Fuck a shoe pump

Fuck the real deal

And fuck all the fakes

Fuck all 52 states, oooh

And fuck...





(Buzz) Well, that sound means that your time is out

Ladies and gentlemen of the audience

If you thought was phat let's hear a round of applause

(Crickets chirp)

Ewww, I'm sorry

Well, that could mean only one thing

THAT SHIT WAS WACK!

(Applause)

Ok we're gonna move right along here

Team number 2, Twiztid

Are you gentlemen ready?

Yeah we straight

Ok what's your first selection for us today?

Hey, hey man they just hoed my shit

Fuck the World was the shit

Diemuthafuckadie

Naww, uh uh

We gonna come with 2nd Hand sec, this on?

2nd Hand Smoke, yeah yeah 2nd Hand Smoke

Alright ladies and gentlemen prepare yourself

This is Twiztid, 2nd Hand Smoke

You be the judge

Phat or Wack?





Free your mind

I represent the East side, no peace

Fuck the police

We tell you to increase the deceased at least

A grown man tellin you something that he believe

Practice to deceive, no more tricks up my sleeve

What the fuck bitch, chuck bitch

Why you talkin shit?

Better duck bitch

Before your dome get hit

This shit is Twiztid deeper than that Old French braid

Stickier than jam and jelly phased, kick it

Everybody else real talkin bout something

What you thought you heard bitch,

Can it, cause your frontin

Dead wrong

Dinner table conversations

Leavin' you pistol-whipped in the corner with abrasions

Part of the contamination of Mind State

Sleep in a dream, hopin it's gone when I awake

Mama think I'm a play on play serial killa

Fruitloop biting my mind like Godzilla

We survive like catapillas in cocoons and caskets

Stretch the industry like elastic

So fantastic, like the Newport cigarette that I smoke

Hit the motherfucka till I choke

I brag and I boast about nothin

Death, dying, and hoes fuckin

So understand that he's saying something

Never be heard I'm underground with the dirt and grime

Smashin heads be my reason for rhyme

I'm on time like a motherfucka

Leavin you hangin in the forest

Standin in some comfortable shifts like Chuck Norris

Check the chorus

Second hand smoke when you breath

Remember what I told you always believe

You relieve on the Monoxide Child and wild

Travel the world on nine cloud screaming loud

Free your mind

Breath it in second hand smoke

Free your mind

Breath it in second hand smoke

You phony bitches wanna shut...





(Buzz)

Oh times up

Audience Phat or Wack?

Applause please

(One clap, then wind blowing)

Ohh I'm sorry

It seems that this audience also feels

THAT SHIT WAS WACK!

Personally I think they both suck

(Applause)

Ok back to contestants number 1

Uhh hopefully this time gentlemen

You'll come with somethin

A little more likable for me and the audience

(They fuckin suck)

Are you ready?

Yeah man c'mon

Yeah we ready fat bitch

What's the name of your selection?

Uhh hold on hold on uhh I have the bomb shit dawg

The Shaggy Show, can't fail

That's wack dawg

Aight then what?

Mufuckin Terrible...

Aight hey we want you to play uhh Terrible, Bink

Here it is, Insane Clown Posse, Terrible

Phat or Wack?





Muthafucka

You don't know shit do ya?

You wouldn't know shit

If it ripped into your ugly bitch ass face

You ain't even begun to expierence drama muthafucka Your Mama

Your muthafuckin big fat chicken faced assed Mama

Don't even know about this drama, muthafucka

Oh my god look at that, turn it up please

Poor Nancy Kerrigan's sweet little knees

Somebody took a black thing and went thump

That's terrible we heard about it for months

What about that one nobody guy that they found

Dead in the grass

With his dick in his ass

Unless there was more

But you won't recall

Cause Michael Jackson squeezed up

On some little kids balls

What you consider DRAMA

Ain't all that

It's just that your wack

With your intergalactic satellite data compress

Yes, but we can't feed the homeless

And then OJ's wack story unfolded

Everybody watched that while Okalahoma exploded

900 good reasons why this world don't really care

Thats what it costs for a wheel chair!

What you know bout terrible?

Terrible, you don't know what's terrible

Terrible, what you know bout terrible?

Terrible, you don't know what's terrible...



(Buzz)

There's the buzzer

Audience Phat or Wack?

THAT SHIT WAS WACK!

Ohh you guys fuckin suck

Your momma sucks my dick

Ok we'll move back over here to team number 2

Twiztid are you ready?

Man fuck you we ready

Do you have a song selected?

Yeah we got a song

What you wanna go with

Man it don't matter

This muthafucka (They booing everything)

Yeah that's what I'm sayin

Rock the Dead, fuck it

Bink bitch

Bink bitch

Fuck you

This is Twiztid Rock the Dead

Phat or Wack?





Wake up, float to the sky

Bring the wicked shit and the dead will arise

Wake up, float to the sky

Bring the wicked shit and the dead will arise

Come on

Space and beyond

Mind dumpin in the yard

I stoles your headstone from your grave plot

Conscience and confused

Seen tomorrows dreams on tonights news

Fallin through a hole in the sky

Will I die?

You know the time multiplied with this life, love, and lies

Steppin in the darkness

Walkin through my conscience

Like an android I remain heartless

Underground, and mental know me well

Bring it to the white lights of the depths of Hell

Walk through the time flux hand and hand with clear mind

Chords are harmonious like the rhythm of windchimes

Peel back the rhyme and examine the fruit

Rotten to the core buried in they best suits

Maggots crawling on they face,

Eyes sunk in they head

Throw your fuckin arms up and rock the dead

Wake up, float to the sky

Bring the wicked shit and the dead will arise

Wake up, float to the sky

Bring the wicked shit and the dead will arise

Come on

Got me a mic, and now we ache like the dead

And all we wanna do is rock the dead

So many thoughts runnin all through my head

But the only one that's clear is rock the...





(Buzz)

Time's up

Ladies and gentlemen

Phat or Wack?

(Silence)

Ohh as that was some sort of surprise

This audience feels

THAT SHIT WAS WACK!

Ok we're gonna mosey on back over to team number 1

The Insane Clown Posse

Fella's are you ready?

Yeah, yeah we ready

But I want uhh everyone in the studio audience

To know y'all can suck my dick!

That's great, but uhh save the drama for your momma

Man I'm bout to bring the drama to your muthafuckin chin

Punk ass bitch

I'm scared, bring it

Now this is your last chance

Do you have a selection ready?

Man fuck it

Let's hit em up with Another Love Song

Yeah they'll probably like the pussy shit

Uhh Another Love Song bitch

Ok ladies and gentlemen

This is Insane Clown Posse Another Love Song

Phat or Wack?





Yeah, I mean I hear what your sayin

I mean you got carried away in the moment

And I could forgive you...I could do that

I could do anything if I wanted to

I could buy you a Lexus Truck

With a white leather interior (I could)

I could kill off some bears and dogs and shit

Just to make you a fur coat

I could love you and treat you with class (Oh yeah)

And have babies fallin all out your ass

But thinkin about that

I feel I'd rather kill you

Cause I got you in my car

You ain't goin no were bitch your dead

I'd rather cut that neck in half

I'd rather choke out that bitch ass

I'd rather chop and never stop

Because you fucked my homie

I'd rather cut that neck in half

I'd rather choke out that bitch ass

I'd rather chop and never stop

Because you fucked my homie...





(Buzz)

Well that was a good song, (Fart) Not

Well audience you built the casket

Time to nail it shut

Phat or Wack?

THAT SHIT WAS WACK!

Well that's gonna do it for Insane Clown Posse It's time for you guys to hit the door

Cause you're definitely wack

Man fuck you, fuck the show, fuck the audience (Ok)

All y'all can fuck off

Man fuck y'all

Yo Jeckel Brothers out May 25th juggalos

Yeah, yeah, yeah

Fuck off, fuck off, fuck off

Alright don't let the door hit you on the ass

We've seen it all before

People come here so eager

And leave so bitter (Hahaha)

On to team number 2

Ok Twiztid here's your last chance

Are you ready?

Man we should fuck you up

Negative muthafucka

What's the selection you're gonna play?

Uhh we got whatthefuck

Umm there's a few but I'm tellin you man

There's crazy booin, crazy

I'm like it don't matter

How does it feel? Bink bitch

How does it feel?

It probably feels wack

Ladies and gentlemen

How does it feel?

Phat or Wack?





How does it feel to be you

How does it feel to feel the way you do

It's so decisive

And I don't care if you like or you hate me

I know you muthafuckas bout to underrate me

How does it feel to be you

How does it feel to feel the way you do

It's so decisive

And I don't care if you like or you hate me

I know you muthafuckas bout to underrate me

You label me a paranoid schizophrenic

Known on this planet for 2 things

Talkin shit and automatic

Mind gets transferred in little walks through the woods

Bury you alive if I could

Robin through the hood with a body in the trunk

Unidentified because he's known as a chump

I hear him keep talking junk in my ear

But nobody else can hear

I look around and I'm feeling weird

Palms are sweaty I'm about to black out

Last chance but nothing could stop this Twiztid sprout

I'm all about mad cussing

Fuck you and the red Martian

Peon wrecking and skull crushing

Turning bitches to dust and when I recite you folks die

Like I creep in the night, I let your soul fly

So high that I never touch ground

Make it so your bodies never found

Another Unsolved Mystery

Looking for some nobody

Every single night on TV

Try to get me to see

My eyes closed and rolled back

Holdin a thought deep in my mind about a car jack

Another break down in the middle of the street

People just kept moving they feet

Treat me like a freak, so how am supposed to act

So when you see me muthafucka...





(Buzz)

There's the buzzer

Audience how did that feel?

THAT SHIT WAS WACK!

Tell me about it

Twiztid beat it (Man you beat it)

Get the hell outta here (Naww fuck that)

We been here all day

Three strikes and your out

June 22nd fool Twiztid Mostasteless

Yeah I know, go ahead

Yeah you know, you don't know nuthin bitch

Let the door close

Ok ladies and gentlemen

We're not gonna leave you with all that wackness

So as the credits roll

We'd like you to enjoy

The all time grand champion Danny K

Now this is what real music is about

Until next time

I'm Burt Chipperwolf

And this has been Phat or Wack

(Some wack rapping)

Promotional consideration paid for

By Island slash Psychopathic

If for any reason you should care for or like

One of the groups that was wack

Might I suggest you go pick up one of their albums

The Insane Clown Posse uhh

Entitled the Amazing Jeckel Brothers

Which will be in stores nationwide May 25th

Or Twiztid Mostasteless

Which will be in stores nationwide June 22nd

As always we'd like to thank you for your

Participation in watching this fine television program That's copyright 1999