I wonder if you can see

I wonder if you can tell

I wonder if you see through the mask I wear so well

I'll never let you know what's going on inside me

My shame locks me down



All the things I wanted tell you

Are all the things I never will

Every time you reached out to me

All I did was push you away



I can't unchain the beast that screams inside me

I hate itit's what I am



It makes me sick to be so mean

What I've been and what I've seen

From top to bottomI am obscene

It stands in my place

It spits in my face

Shame



You smile I smile back

You ask me how I am I say I'm fine

I don't know why I'm so torn up inside my mind

The darkness swallows me whole



Don't go too deepdon't ask me why

Don't try to know medon't make me lie

I wish I didn't know the things I know so well

I try to change but it's what I am