Now I've been married about six months
Only six months you see
The first three months, was all okay
But the last three is killin' me
My wife began her hissin', cut down on her kissin'
And then she failed to shine my shoes
My shirts they came up wrinkled
My pants with dirt were sprinkled
And then I took the first year blues.

Well, then she started naggin'
She left the sink a-saggin'
With dishes piled up high
No food upon the table, she said if she was able
She'd cook something bye and bye
Then I began to wonder, if I had made a blunder
When I said I do, she must have read my thinkin'
Her eyes began to blinkin' and that gal broke into.

Well, I heard the dishes crashin'
And I began to dashin', gettin' out of sight
For right there was my honey
On who I'd spent my money, turnin' into dynamite
Then after she'd exploded, her meanness all unloaded
And things began to simmer down
I found myself a-bleedin', and very much a-needin'
Of stitches taken all around.

Well, then she started cryin', I felt myself a-sighin'
And then I took her in my arms
I was afraid to scold her, so I just gently told her
She didn't do a bit of harm
Now the first six months is over, and I am much the older
And experienced with a wife
If I can stand the next six, my friends all say I'll be fixed
To take it the rest of my life...