You want me to bring you home the bacon
Fry it up and serve it to you, too
When I don't, you act so godforsaken
Like somehow I've been mistreating you
I know that's the way your mama did it
She waited on you dank, near all your life
It took a while but now I finally get it
You were never looking for a wife

If you want a mother I can be one
That ain't all that difficult for me
We can do it your way from now on, son
And I'll show you what a mother I can be

Remember tuesday night, when you're out bowling
You better have your butt back home by nine
Otherwise you're grounded for the weekend
And that brand new sliverado will be mine
And in the evening when you're feeling sleepy
Well, I'll tuck you in and pat you on your head
And I'll be right down the hall if you should need me
But big boys have to sleep in their own bed

If you want a mother I can be one
That ain't all that difficult for me
We can do it your way from now on, son
And I'll show you what a mother I can be

If you want a mother I can be one
That ain't all that difficult for me
We can do it your way from now on, son
And I'll show you what a mother I can be

You can go on back to mama's apron strings
Bet your mom would be a mother just like me