I am sick with this



his scent swims around me

like a perfume too heavy for summer

me lost thing

intoxicated

curled within him

drowning over and over



charmed disarmed

he comes when least expected

sits too close

lingers too long

stares too deeply

and claims me with something I cannot name



lightheaded and clean

this is a gift

biting tongue until blood

I am sick with him



talk goes no deeper than tonight

words are tickets to spend time

skin is talking to skin

loud



I know not to go too deep

but when his hands stop

tremble, temptation

I thrill back

open up

crawl walls



this woman is no man's

this man is no one's

this one is mine



in a full room, alone on a couch

he is throned

doesn't move

knows I will come



smitten

it vibrates

makes drinks tremble

food wastes time

cigarettes are for curling smoke

and drawing me in



this is bloody business



guilt makes for poor postcards

so he comes in for a while

what do we know of this?



doesn't know if he'll be allowed to stay


but he looks a while too long

and stirs the close air

dragging me to the bottom of the lake



couches are for excuses

and temptation

crushed in too deep to breathe

swoon again skin you do not know

with hands that know too much

of what you must never say



flesh to curl to grind

to feign sleep to balance wishes

on tongues and wait for the time

now



cozy he calls me

says I smell like sweet cream

closed eyes bring on a luscious film

of time and silence



he tastes like stars

he feels like thunder



regret makes you bitter

he says

come in and swim



we disappear into a dusk

we'll never own

and never quite shake



a luscious slice

of water

lack of sleep makes me drift

lake of sleep makes me wonder



he will exist

he will evaporate

I am sick with him, gone



in regret dreams he is low and sweet

dark like a drift storm

holding me down under the waves

telling me not to talk

not to move

this will only take an hour

or two