I don't like haggis
I don't like booze
That's ok it's what i choose
I don't have a girl
Cause I'm a bum
That's ok they cost a ton

That's ok
Well that's ok
We don't need them anyway
That's ok
Well that's ok
We don't need them anyway
Go!

I don't do drugs
I don't smoke pipes
That's because I have a life
I milk my cow
I milk my pig
You wanna stop me
That the girls all dig

That's ok
Well that's ok
We don't need them anyway
That's ok
Well that's ok
We don't need them anyway
Go!

(spoken)
So how's it goin' Ingus McCloud

(spoken)
Arr not so good.
I bought myself a pretty bird but the darn thing turned out to be woodpecker.
That thing peckered a hole in the bottom of me boat and we sunk down to Davy Jones.

(spoken)
Davy Jones you say?

(spoken)
Arr

(spoken)
How's that fellow doing anyway?

(spoken)
Ah the old dog?
He's not doing so well.
He's dead.
He had his throat cut from ear to ear.

(spoken)
You don't say?

(spoken)
Arr.  Bad luck for that fool

(sung)
I say That's ok
Well that's ok
We don't need them anyway
That's ok
Well that's ok
We don't need them anyway
Go!