EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!

DONALD TRUMP!

VERSUS!



HILLARY CLINTON!

BEGIN!



I've been in this game too long

I'm a public servant

Have been since I met MLK in person

I'm a woman of the people, that's for certain

You're a man of the people who don't like turbans

I was living in the West Wing while you were professional wrestling

You got skin like Russian dressing

From too much Russian investing

You been going bankrupt since the 90's

If I was in Iran, you couldn't find me

You don't care about the job, Trump

You just think the desk is shiny

I said that I respect your children

But that wasn't quite right, yo

Looking like some extras from American Psycho

First name is Hillary, middle name, Rodham, last name is Clinton and lyrics, I got 'em

You fire celebrities on The Apprentice

Motherf**ker, I fire bin Laden!

How do I say this? You're racist

Ooh, you must get so pissed that your hands are too small to stop and frisk

So you use your fingers to touch chicks

(She's only 12 years old)

That's enough, shit

(But she's married, sir)

Just gotta get pushy

(That's your daughter)

Well, grab her by the pussy

That's assault, brotha!

Don't tell me the victim's at fault, sucka!

You don't know shit about steaks, yucka!

But the ones on the 8th are great, muthaf**ka!

Better save the date, I'm gonna rock the vote

Bad bitch on the scene like Murder, She Wrote

So go ahead Donald, let me see your flow

I brought Michelle's speech, borrow some quotes



Let me just say I respect all females

But your rhymes are trash

Put 'em next to your emails

Our country's in crisis

Who wants to vote for the mother of ISIS?

That might not be exactly true

But I don't do politeness

You wanna talk about misogyny?

Your Bill's worse than Cosby

He left a mess on that dress

Like you left in Benghazi

You wanna break the glass ceiling

Hillary, I sense it

But the only crack you'll find is my ass pressed against it

The numbers are in and I'm right on your tail

You don't have the stamina, baby, you're frail

This will be just like '08 when you fail

But Trump will appoint you to jail

How do I say this? You're a two

And you almost lost the primary to a socialist Jew

What do the American people gotta yankee doodle do

To get it through your fat face that they're just not that into you?

They want a strong male leader, who can stand up to China (China, China, China)

Not a crooked little wishy-washy bleeding heart vagina

I'm gonna run these streets like I run my casinos

More police and less Latinos

While you bury us in debt buying poor people socks

I'll create jobs tearing down mosques

Then I'll use all the best rocks from the site to build a wall

Dip it in gold and make Mexico pay for it all

I'll make this country great again

We'll all be living large

I'll tell Congress you're fired and put Charles in charge

'Cause this whole system's rigged and we all know the riggers

For the last eight years, this country's been run by-



CAW!



Are you f**king kidding me with this blah blah blah?

I've half a mind to feed you both to my oversized-



CAW!



I've heard more thoughtful discussion up in TMZ

You two got brother blocking brother on their Facebook feed

I'm so sick and tired of this ridiculous shit

If this is the best my party gets, then my party should quit



Ha!



I'm sorry, did I say something that you found funny?

Wipe that creepy-ass smile off your face and beat this dummy!

And if she does win the White House, be a man and hold the door

Don't get your fans stirred up in some sorta Twitter civil war

Here's an equal opportunity smack down in the sequel

That's of the people, by the people, for the people

EAGLE!



CAW!



WHO WON?

WHO'S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY