I bought a pair of pants

At the corner store

They were size fourty-one

I'm size thirty-four

So I took them to a tailor

And I tried them on

And he took them in

And I took them home

Now they felt just fine

Until I read this tag

On the inside leg

And it chilled my spine



They were the pants that Curly died in

They were the pants he could not hide in

And they had a button fly

And they poked me in the eye



Whadja do that for?



And it was my defeat

When I wore them on the street

'Cause I would go



Whoop (repeat 4 times)



And I would go



I'm a victim of circumstance!



And I would say



Hey Moe! Hey Larry! Free eats!



For my pants I've paid!

And my pants went:



I keep tryina think but nothin' happens!



And my pants went:



Ahra- hra -hra -hra



And my pants went:



Hey Moe! I think I'm havin' a cardiac arrest!