Flying in the car, looking like a star, just like a galaxy

Go so hard like a callus be, uh

Burning more things than calories



KID: I see you homie, I see you. Working, huh?



BarsTaLoan: You feel me? You see me right? I got bars, kid



KID: Word? That's what's up man



KID: Hold up, you heard of Chris Webby though?



BarsTaLoan: Chris Webby? Man I ain't worried about Chris Webby, man, I told you. I'm the illest out here in CT, I'm not worried bout no motherf**king ninja turtles, f**k a Mario man, this motherf**ker looks like f**king Rob Dyrdek and shit, f**k that dude



KID: Funny story, he's here right now!



BarsTaLoan: Oh word, like here? At this part?



KID: Ayo Web!



BarsTaLoan: Nah nah nah it's cool...



KID: Web!



BarsTaLoan: Yo chill, chill, chill, chill...



KID: Come check this dude out, this dude is crazy



BarsTaLoan: Yo man, Bar Stallone that's my name. duce me as Bar Stallone, Please



KID: f**k outta here. Ayo Web! Yo get your hands off that bitch



WEBBY: What!?



BarsTaLoan: Yo he's busy man just leave him alone, cmon man



WEBBY: f**king fine, alright listen baby, you just stay right there for like 5 minutes, I swear to God I'll be right back. (to kid) What do you want? What the f**k is up?



KID: This dude is talking mad shit, show him what the f**k time it is



WEBBY (sighs): Alright. Yo Kenny! Kenny!



BarsTaLoan: Who the f**k is Kenny...



WEBBY: Get over here real quick, man, we need a beat box, man



KENNY: Right now?



WEBBY: C'mere man, just come over here man



KENNY: Alright, alright I'm coming



WEBBY: Ayo everybody keep it down for a second



BarsTaLoan: No no no keep partying, y'all keep going



WEBBY: Gotta do a little rap thing, ya know? You ready?



KENNY (in robot voice): I'm ready



BarsTaLoan: What the f**k is that?



Yo, it's Chris Webby

At this party and shit, motherf**ker wants me to rap

I'm about to open an abortion clinic right next to your local church

And go to narcotics anonymous hustling coke and percs

I'm just trying to piss you off, I really hope it works

Go berzerk, I got a dirty mouth, I'll never hold a curse

Jerking off until my motherf**king shoulder hurts

Even if she vegan she gon swallow when my boner squirts

Help an older lady across the road, "hey can I hold your purse?"

Then kick her in front of a moving bus, "oh no, she's hurt!"

Shit I'm pretty sure she's dead but you can check yourself

While I run her wallet and spend all the money at Taco Bell

Anyone this deranged should surely be locked in jail

I'm on the grind but off the rails like an Eric Koston fail

I hit it rapid fire, try to pull out of a vaginal cavity

But busted while I was half inside her

Then I woke up in the morning and had a reminder

That she getting plan B for breakfast with an apple cider

Someone pass the lighter, I need some weed to breathe in

He's a demon, dirty mind, sneaky heathen

I don't need a reason

I'm creeping up like sex offenders with binoculars on a beach in bikini season

You won't see me leaving, I'm running through that

Stomp you to death then throw my Nike's back on the shoe rack

Huh I'ma do that, why bother tryna bleach the blood stains out?

Somebody told me orange is the new black

So I scrub my white T til it turns the color copper

And use some Tide detergent and throw it up in the washer

It's weird that I ain't crazy though, shit you can ask my doctor

Sike, I'm off my rocker like an active grandfather, motherf**ker



WEBBY: Your turn, bro



BarsTaLoan: I actually gotta save my voice for my open mic tomorrow, bro



WEBBY: Oh yeah? That's cool bro. Seriously. (to party) Who wants to get back to drinking?!?!