I had one pint of beer, and one shot of scotch, 
I had one bottle of wine, and bourbon on the rocks 
I had one lassie on me right, another on the left, 
I looked that puppet in the eye and said give me the 
test

A long time ago, in a pub far away, 
I sat on a barstool, just drinking away, 
I couldn't hold it down, I guess I had too much 
I felt a tremor in the force and then I lost my lunch
I woke up in a desert land, feeling hot and sick, 
I saw a bearded man, he looked like some kind of hick, 
He slowly waved his hand, and my pain was gone 
He said let's go see Yoda, and I'll teach you this 
song.

So we got on a starship, and flew off into space 
He said his name was Obi-Wan and there is no time to 
waste, 
I have to get you trained before it is too late, 
He said drink this bottle of whisky, and don't give in 
to hate.
My training went on, and I'd drank most of the bar 
We stopped for supplies on the nearest Death Star 
I learned to control my fear, and hold my alcohol 
Soon I was able to stand even when Obi-Wan would fall. 

[Star Wars theme song]

I sat down beside him and looked him in the eye 
He broke the silence, said you judge me by my size 
Obi-Wan said careful, for Yoda is the best 
I said ok shorty, bring on the test
Well I could tell you how it ended, I could tell you 
some lies Let's just say, on that night the force was 
on his side 
I got all riled up, and they threw me in jail 
I said I don't believe it, Yoda said that's why I 
failed

KEY F

verse/chorus:
G G D D
G G C-D7-G
G G D D
G G C-D7-G

Star Wars theme:
G G C G
G G C G
C-G-C D D7 

Background: Yes, I am a Star Wars fan, and when I heard 
this song, I had to learn it! So here it is. The 
recorded version is by the Dust Rhinos who authored the 
song. But give us some time and we'll post our own 
unique version with Darth Vader and all!