Well, I'm stranded in the city that never sleeps
Some of these women they just give me the creeps
I'm avoidin' the Southside the best I can
These memories I got, they can strangle a man

Well I came ashore in the dead of the night
Lot of things can get in the way when you're tryin' to do what's right
You don't understand it - my feelings for you
You'd be honest with me if only you knew

I'm not sorry for nothin' I've done
I'm glad I fought - I only wish we'd won
The Siamese twins are comin' to town
People can't wait - they're gathered around

When I left my home the sky split open wide
I never wanted to go back there - I'd rather have died
You don't understand it - my feelings for you
You'd be honest with me if only you knew

My woman got a face like a teddy bear
She's tossin' a baseball bat in the air
The meat is so tough you can't cut it with a sword
I'm crashin' my car, trunk first into the boards

You say my eyes are pretty and my smile is nice
Well, I'll sell it to ya at a reduced price
You don't understand it - my feelings for you
You'd be honest with me, if only you knew

Some things are too terrible to be true
I won't come here no more if it bothers you
The Southern Pacific leaving at nine forty-five
I'm having a hard time believin' some people were ever alive

I'm stark naked, but I don't care
I'm going off into the woods, I'm huntin' bare
You don't understand it - my feelings for you
Well, you'd be honest with me if only you knew

I'm here to create the new imperial empire
I'm going to do whatever circumstances require
I care so much for you - didn't think that I could
I can't tell my heart that you're no good

Well, my parents they warned me not to waste my years
And I still got their advice oozing out of my ears
You don't understand it - my feelings for you
Well, you'd be honest with me if only you knew