What you need more from Christmas
Than candy canes and toys
I'll deliver something to help fill up your void
There are no elves or reindeer working at this pole
But if you've been a good girl
I'll warm you in the cold
Stockings aren't the only things hung this holy night
I'll make sure your Christmas is white
I got a special package for you to unwrap
Then I'll shower you with more gifts
From my giant sack
Just think how much better off you'd be
If everyone could get some Scottie underneath their tree
In the Christmas spirit, I'd even visit Jews
And put the joy of Christmas, deep inside of you