He's a pretty good guy
He's nice to his neighbors, uh huh
You can count on him to buy your school candy bars
He's a real nice guy
He always got the jumper cable, uh heyow, uh heyow
He'll take your mail in when you're on vacation
He's a good-hearted man
Volunteers at the library, hey ho
He'll help you find a book on whales
He's a thoughtful man
Remembers your boithday, yuh, heyow, heyow
Says G-d bless you when you sneeze

But there's a problem
It's not your average problem
But it's a pretty big problem
His hobby is moyda
His hobby is moyda
He'll eat hamboyga
Then commit moyda

He's a friendly guy
He waves to all the joggers, hey hi
Children use his backyard as a short-cut, hoo, heyow
He's a real sweet guy
He'll take you to the airport, say hey
You can borrow his snow-blower anytime you want, you know that
He's a cool, cool guy
He always recycles, hidy hi hidy ho
Referees the Junior High basketball for no pay, oh yeah
He's a great, great man
He'll sign your petition, hee haw
Then proceed to compliment your new haircut

But there's a problem
It's not a common problem
But it's a pretty big problem
His hobby is moyda
His hobby is moyda
South of the boyda
He's wanted for moyda

Here he comes
Hey Larry, how ya doin'?
How's the garden coming?
You know, it's interesting
I just read at the library
That you need to rotate the soil
To get real plump, red tomatoes
Oh, and one more thing

My hobby is moyda
Two, three, four
I'm a sick man
My hobby is moyda
I'll eat at hamboyga
Then commit moyda, eyeah, heeyeah



I never loiter
After committing the doity deed of moyda



Only Sigmund Freuda
Knows why I cannot and will not stop committing moyda



Murder, murder, murder, murder, murder