Cosher Bailey had an engine
It was always wanting mending
And according to the power
She could do four miles an hour

Did you ever see, did you ever see
Did you ever see such a funny thing before?

On the night run up from Gower
She went twenty miles an hour
As she whistled through the station
Man, she frightened half the nation

Did you ever see, did you ever see
Did you ever see such a funny thing before?

Cosher bought her second-hand
And he painted her so grand
When the driver went to oil her
Man, she nearly burst her boiler

Did you ever see, did you ever see
Did you ever see such a funny thing before?

Cosher Bailey's sister Lena
She was living up in Blaina
She could knit and darn our stockings
But her cooking it was shocking

Did you ever see, did you ever see
Did you ever see such a funny thing before?

[Cosher Bailey's brother Rupert
He played stand-off-half for Newport,
When they played against Llanelly
Someone kicked him in the belly]

[Cosher Bailey had a daughter
Who did things she didn't oughter
She was quite beyond the pale
But over that we'll draw a veil]

Cosher Bailey went to Exford
For to pass matriculation
But he saw a pretty barmaid
And he never left the station

Did you ever see, did you ever see
Did you ever see such a funny thing before?

[Oh the sight it was heart-rending
Cosher drove his little engine
And he got stuck in the tunnel
And went up the bloomin' funnel]

[Cosher Bailey's little engine
Couldn't even sound its hooter
Just to make the steam go higher
He made water on the fire]

Yes, Cosher Bailey he did die
And they put him in a coffin
But, alas, they heard some knocking
Cosher Bailey, only joking

Did you ever see, did you ever see
Did you ever see such a funny thing before?

Well, the Devil wouldn't have him
But he gave him sticks and matches
For to set up on his own
On the top of Barford Hatches

Did you ever see, did you ever see
Did you ever see such a funny thing before?
Crawshay Bailey