Got this funny feeling going through my head 
That if I go down to the pub I might just end up in bed 
With a blond or a brunette or a red head or two 
But oh what am I saying that'll never happen to you 
Can this be right? Can this be wrong? 
Doing what I'm doing all night long 
I love to brag, I love to boast 
And all the lads in the pub think I've had the most 
You see 'cos I just love to fantasize 
All these thoughts I've got inside 
It can't be healthy what I'm doing 
I'd like to get them out my head 
Before I go blind in my bed 
Time to change is days and she's heading for you 
She knows just what she wants and she knows what to do 
She drags you back to her place step over the toys 
The baby-sitters sleeping so we can't make much noise 
It's been so long, I won't go fast 
Ejaculation, celebration here at last 
Pig in shit, cat and the cream 
I open up my eyes, but It's another wet dream 
You see 'cos I just love to fantasize 
All these thoughts I've got inside 
It can't be healthy what I'm doing 
I'd like to get them out my head 
Before I go blind in my bed 
I've had this funny feeling lying in my bed 
Someone's spreading rumours down the King's Head 
But I've got this reputation and I can't stop it now 
I'd like to be in heaven but this feels like hell 
Can this be right? Can this be wrong? 
Doing what I'm doing all night long 
I love to brag, I love to boast 
And all the lads in the pub think I've had the most 
You see 'cos I just love to fantasize 
I close my eyes she's always there 
Why am I living this nightmare? 
She's a darling in my eyes 
But I just love to fantasize 
You see 'cos I just love to fantasize 
On my bed I always lie 
Same old blue book in my hand 
To the pictures I relate 
Is this my world is this my fate?