Fruit of the Loom, Calvin Klein

No matter what the underwear goes up your behind

Buy what size you want, the underwear don't stop

Climin' up your butt for an embarrassing time

It's called a wedgie, and there's nothing you can do

Because the power of the wedge overpowers you

It's a magical force that pulls your underwear up

Get a wedgie and walkin' is tough



[chorus]

It's a magical force that nobody understands

It's a universal threat to your mind

Your voice gets hoarse and there's sweat in your hands

As the wedgie goes up your behind

Guard your back give a warning to your friends

Don't try livin' life on the edge

Watch out for the attack, it's a powerful trend

It's the magical force of the wedge



Some call it sick some call it obscene

You can see his butt-crack right through the dude's jeans

I don't know which is worse, a wedge up their back

Or when they bend over, carpenter crack

It's a form of torture for nerds of all sorts

Just lift 'em in the air by the back of their shorts

I bought a couple pairs from a Star Trek store

And they boldly went where they've never gone before

Once they go up they feel like plastic

Time turns 'em into swiss cheese with an elastic

It won't be long, in fact it's quite soon

You can keep your pants on and still chuck a full moon

Everybody gets 'em, everybody picks 'em

Everybody hates it when their underwear tricks 'em

Some poeple pick wedgies discretely, some bold

Some poeple look like they're diggin' for gold



[chorus]