(parody of "Gangsta's Paradise" by Coolio)



As I walk through Las Vegas oh this city is def

I take a look in my wallet and realize there's nothing left

'Cause I've been bettin' and losing for so long that

I still hear lots of bells and my money is gone

But I ain't never played a game that was really worth it

Me win on a slot machine, you know that's unheard of

But then this one machine I'm playing, just kept on payin'

Unfortunately that was the ATM

I bet through dinner time so I skip the meal

As the ball goes by my number on the roulette wheel

Damn, I'm the type of guy who never seems to beat the odds

But I'm back every night saying goodbye to the green gods

[chorus]

I keep paying out the price

When I roll this lousy pair o' dice

(repeat)



The dice are laughing at me, they always trap me

I can't roll a number seven, I get plagued by the craps

I put all my money down to throw my point

But not only don't I get it I don't see the point

My luck it all ran out 'cause I couldn't find the cork

Seen more craps in my life than a plumber from New York

I'm a brainwashed gambler and chronic cursor

But my luck's gotta change because it can't get worse

Piles of chips like to dwindle away

I make less in a year than what I lost today

I got 23 mortgages, should I make it 24?

Oh hell, it doesn't matter, just one more



Tell me why are we so blind to see

That they'll take us for every last penny?

(chorus)



Liquor and the money, money and the liquor

When alcohol is thinking, the money goes quicker

Everybody's betting, and most of them are losing

But they don't give a damn, because of all the boozing

My butt is going numb 'cause I lost the circulation

I can't afford the plane ticket back from my vacation

I'm outta cash, I'm outta luck, I stepped in crud

I think I'm gonna try and sell my blood now

(chorus)