(parody of "Ice Ice Baby" by Vanilla Ice)



[chorus]

Dice Dice Baby

Dice Dice Baby



He can't stop, can he be clean? Never

Dice is back and he's hornier than ever

Steps to the mic but he don't say nothin'

When he starts talking he still says nothin'

Will he ever stop? Yo, I doubt it

People gather 'round let me tell you about it

Sick, he'd be a genius, 'though

If his I.Q. was as big as his ego

Jokes, he doesn't know how to write 'em

Can't write a one, but he knows how to bite 'em

Insults, that's all he pours on

Thinks he's the best but he's dressed like a moron

Light it and smoke it, he's gonna die soon

Wraps his arm around his head just like a baboon

If there's a dirty joke bet he knows it

Watch his career as the Dice man blows it



[chorus]



Always huffin' and puffin'

Like the Big Bad Wolf, but he ain't sayin' nothing

Now that he's known he's no longer funny

Harder to stop than the Energizer Bunny

Hates you, if you're not just like him

But I'd kill myself before I acted like him

Life ain't fair, his head's real dense

But he's makin' money I'm not even makin' sense

Leather, is all he wears

With his George Jetson snap-on hair

Women can't stand him, eMpTyV banned him

What about his movie? It left him stranded

Music, hates songs like this one

He wears studs 'cause he thinks he's one

He'll insult you if he gets the chance

His fairy tales insult you're intellegence

All he talks about are girls in bikinis

In real life his girls wear beanies

Live, he's more than rude

Spice has a rhyme about Dice with an attitude

If he was funny it'd be different

But his tapes sound worse than the ones in his basement

Posse, called Sudden Death

I better hurry up 'cause I'm runnin' out of breath

No respect for anything

Dice is convinced he was born to be king

Babble on and on, man, king of what?

His entire second tape is proof that he's nuts

I wanna check him out when he turns 81

Will he be the same with no hair and a big butt

If there's a dirty joke, bet he knows it

Watch his career as the Dice man blows it



[chorus]



Take heed, he's a comical monster

Dice is a man that does what he wants to

Fine, let him speak his wind

It'll keep him happy, out of our skin

'Cause the man's like a new born baby

Cryin' and crappin', driving me crazy

Give the man a pacifier, tell him it's a cigarrette

'Cause if you don't, then he'll wanna get

On stage, and give you his routine

Talk like a drug addict, walk like a chimpanzee

Goodbye, go find your brain

If his life was a ring he'd throw it down the drain

Lost respect and he lost it fast

Magnified by the fact that he has no class

If there's a dirty joke bet he knows it

Watch his career as the Dice man blows it



[chorus]

[chorus]